Giant babies

The giant babies are mysterious creations that existed long before the first documented writings. When midgets first explored what they now call 'Land of the Blessed', they found multicolored diarrhea and feces of incredible magnitudes. Entire mountains were made of boom boom, causing death and sickness to Midget Squad MK 00B as they made their daring discoveries.

The squad wrote of an ear shattering sound one night that caused explorer Ron Tinylegs, fifth of his line, to leave the Midget camp, drawn to the screech. Ron Tinylegs returned five hours later, soaked in poo and missing both of his nipples. All he could manage to say before passing was "babies...". The squad would later discover the horrifying weight of his ominous words.

The only surviving member of the squad, young recruit and now convicted pedophile Flibby Nubbs, described what he saw in what was the midget's first, and last, encounter of the mysterious beings.

"There were babies... At least 100 stories tall (take into mind that since midgets are very short, their floors are shorter and thus 100 midget stories might be around 10 or 20 normal stories, I'm not entirely positive on the exact specifics of that"). There were thousands of them, all shoveling in loads of baby foods from an unknown source. When they cried, the midgets listened... They felt compelled to wipe and nurse the big bad babies until death. I only made it out because I lost my cock and balls in a fishing accident, so I lack the biological imperative needed to tend to such foul big little creatures."

I am attempting to acquire more information from the council, but every species that I have talked to is surprisingly hush about the mysterious life forms. Some say they are grown in a lab by an ethereal, other-dimensional scientist who is attempting to create the God Being. Some say they come from the womb of Va, the Ginal mother of motherhood. Where they come from doesn't matter, though. All that matters is that wherever they go, they will undoubtedly leave rivers of puke and mountains of poo in their wake. Avoid the babies at all costs. Because they are big dumb babies, they lack the ability to communicate, and as such, the babies' representative on the council of doinks is Flibby Nubbs himself. He vehemently claims that his convicted pedophilia and passion to represent the babies is completely unrelated.